Never Stop Trying
Happy 100th birthday to myself
I know it was hard. It started hard, why it would not finish hard I can’t imagine. Who knows, we may have another score in us yet, so chin up. I’ve heard it said that the things people regret most are those which they did not do, and not the things that they did. The past couple of years have been difficult for me because I accomplished all of the plans that I had imagined necessary, or that seemed doable in our life. Perhaps, I did not plan on us living this long. I never thought of after, or next. For this life I hoped only to be a loving wife and mother. With our children grown and Corey working so far away, we are alone most of the time. I never realized how our mountaintop could turn into a lonesome prison. It is a beautiful paradise all our own. It was not good for Adam to be alone in Eden… It is no different for us. No amount of livestock or expanse of lustrous gardens will quench the emptiness that floods us when we are alone this often.
I wish I knew what you know… the answer. I know you found one. For now I am just learning to dream again. I have found our individual talent, and I am trying to breathe life into it. What will come of it, I know not. When we were young we thought we understood. I am now sure that I have only begun to understand. I will do my best by you. I will search… I will grow… I will try… When I get to you I want to know that I did everything I could have thought to do… learned everything that was placed in front of us, loved selflessly all those who we were blessed to belong to, inspired as many people as possible with the length and breadth that had been afforded us.
I know it’s a tall glass to fill, but I don’t like finishing. I never want us to feel cut short again. I want our dreams to outlive us. I am OK with pursuing a standard instead of an expectation. I hope this little note finds you just as motivated as it has found me today. I hope you continue to live, love and inspire… hard or not.
Never Stop Trying
I’ll see you sooner than I can imagine I’m sure
Love you… just a little bit younger
…. Feel free to explore my newly launched studio site….